01.22.07
Posted in Songs at 10:25 am by erald17
There’s always something in the way
There’s always something getting through
But it’s not me
It’s you, it’s you
Sometimes ignorance rings true
But hope is not in what I know
It’s not in me…me
It’s in you, it’s in you
It’s all I know
It’s all I know
It’s all I know
I find peace when I’m confused
I find hope when I’m let down
Not in me…me
In you
It’s in you
I hope to lose myself for good
I hope to find it in the end
not in me…me
In you
In you
It’s all I know
It’s all I know
It’s all I know
In you
In you
It’s in you
It’s in you
There’s always something in the way
There’s always something getting through
But it’s not me
It’s you
It’s you
It’s you…
(Switchfoot)
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01.19.07
Posted in Journal at 1:36 am by erald17
"I am not convinced."
This has been the statement that seems to be tagging ’round my neck for the entire debate society to see since the first time I debated. It was 13th of October 2005, I was standing on the podium preparing to be interpellated by the second speaker of the affirmative side, when this opponent, a seminarian, greeted me, "Good morning to the beautiful speaker of the negative side." With sarcasm I responded, "I am not convinced."
I has been a long while since i uttered that statement. but it has been coming back to me over and over again. "I am not convinced." since that day, i have said these words at the back of my mind perhaps hundreds of times. at the back of my mind, i would say these during class discussions, when i read articles, when i listen to speeches, when i talk with people. many a times would i say, at the back of my mind, "I am not convinced." Yes, no matter how much i try to be open-minded, no matter how open-minded i seem to be in the opinion of others, still there are so many things with which i would not agree. many things…
this is why sometimes i try to detach the idea of debate from my day to day dealing and conversation with other people. in debate, you cannot choose which side to defend. you cannot defend based on what you know and believe to be right. in debate, an answer may be limited to a yes or a no. and it matters much. on the other hand, the normal conversation we have with the people we encounter in each day gives us the avenue to discern which idea will serve us best. we can always choose to react and counteract, to agree and to disagree. to believe and not to believe. it takes an enormous amount of respect for others’ opinions and beliefs, but it also requires sufficient amount of caution to guard our minds against ideas that can abuse our ignorance, manipulate our weakness, or worse, lead us on……..
the question now is "How can you convince me?"
i have said this hundreds of times, and it is never hard for me to say it over and over again, ’cause i am not..i am not convinced.
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01.18.07
Posted in Journal at 12:28 am by erald17
i don’t know what to do, i don’t know what to say… why do i keep on holding on?
this is something my words cannot explain… what do I want? how can i be sure? i just can’t understand………………..
this is an essay without conclusion….
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01.17.07
Posted in Published at 5:45 pm by erald17
I cannot forget my first moment to compete in an extemporaneous speaking contest. I was a third year student in high school then when I was chosen to represent my school in the 22nd Karibok ang Tuktok Extemporaneous Speaking Contest sponsored by the UP Batangan. I had no specific trainer, and definitely, I had no prepared speech. All I had was the will. That was the moment when I had proven that will - coupled with work - enables one to hit the target.
Some four years ago, a philosophical statement stimulated my youthful mind, "No one steps on the same river twice." That conception made me deem that my every experience is extraordinary and incomparable. The same muse drove me to grab my pen immediately after tonight’s competition.
It is my sixth time to publicly deliver a contested extemporaneous speech. But even though all of them are nonetheless of the same mechanics, common goal, equal number of audience, each endeavor differs for the reason that each bears a significant virtue that has transformed me from competition to competition.
Tonight’s event stirred my inquisitiveness that in the heat of the moment I was able to see life as a form of extemporaneous speaking. Extemporaneous basically means on the spot, unplanned, unprepared.
And being a comrade of this friend called life for more than seventeen years; I might as well consider it as an omnibus of surprising topics and terrifying questions. The general theme would symbolize our perception of life. The specific topics are the exact events that happen to us from day to day which we cannot predict. Yet the theme would be the basis of the kind of speech that we are going to deliver. In its relevance to life, the way we respond to every situation is dependent on how we plot life’s definition.
Many of our life’s circumstances are faced unprepared. In the midst of the moment, there are times that we would falter. We would stop for seconds to think of what we are going to say or do next. Some words we regret having said them. But nothing can be undone. Extemporaneous delivery, hence, imparts to us the attitude of vigilance. Louis Pasteur once quoted, "Chance favors the prepared mind."
As Filipinos, we are faced with several challenges. Most of the time, we, particularly the Filipino youth, are pressured by the society, media and technology.
Obdurate questions persistently fret our fragile morale. Often times, we do not know how to respond. We feel that we are not eqipped with the ideas, capacity and power to deal with challenges. But what can keep us going?
Speeches last for minutes. Existence lasts a lifetime. But regardless of the span of time they take, both require articulacy and initiative.
In life’s battlefield, we are the ones who must think and do the planning, organizing and eventually delivery or execution. We are given the opportunity to be heard and that we must seize. Take the chance. Seize the day. Carpe diem!
As youth leaders of the Philippines, there is a need to be prepared and to be steadfast. Whatever trial that may come along our way, let us try not to be petrified but pervently strive to thump the nerves of the people adjoining us. Hand in hand, let us set our action plans, anchored by the idealism of the people who came before us and provided the prime purpose of our existence - to initiate a better change and keep on executing though the roads may be tough and opponents greater in number.
"Worth living is the life full of undertakings."
(This was written during the 2nd Luzon Rizal Youth Leadership Institute in Caliraya, Lumban, Laguna, Nov. 25-28, 2005.)
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01.03.07
Posted in Four Corners at 12:20 pm by erald17
Esmeralda C. Balita
L2A
Ecclesa
Reflection on Immersion at Barangay Talisay
Dec. 8, 2006
True enough, the unexpected happens. I thought sadness would dawn on me once I arrive at the house of our foster family. But upon carefully examining how the people from that house lived, I cannot help feeling the gladness and amazement at how they managed to survive with the little that they have. Indeed, they have tiny piece of land where they cultivate fruits and vegetables, a small nipa hut where they quietly reside, a simple sari-sari store in which they invest money and labor, but it is the attitude of the residents that makes these small things bigger than any hacienda, mansion or supermarket that I have seen.
When I entered the doorstep of Itay Cesar and Inay Julie, questions began to form in my mind. Many of which have something to do on survival, satisfaction, comfort and fulfillment. It was then that I realized I do have a lot of things, far more than what I actually need. It is so ironic how students like us complain so often about many things that we want to have. But in fact, we just can go about life with a few things and even find joys in them. So is the case of our foster family.
At first, I felt a pang of discontentment having to bathe in a toilet covered by dried coconut leaves, to sleep on a papag which gets cold beneath in the middle of the night, to eat tuyo under the dim light of a candle. But upon hearing the full laughter and courageous singing of our siblings in Talisay, the feeling of discontentment was converted into gladness and peace as I realized that I have many reasons to be grateful, generous, humble and compassionate.
The happiness of our family there was not derived from any material wealth or possession. Such form of happiness is a shallow one. Rather, their dreams and hard work are what give smile in their faces and glitter in their eyes, a deeper form happiness that grows amidst simplicity and poverty.
It was my first time to participate in a painting activity, a job usually done by carpenters. While I was doing the job for the newly-built chapel, I felt as if I were applying color to the spirituality of the people living in Brgy. Talisay. The feeling was intensified by the presence of my schoolmates who are in unity in accomplishing the task. More so, there I have learned the value of cooperation and helpfulness.
By words I knew how it was like to live in poverty. But the learning has never been this strong when I got the chance to actually live with them, when all their daily experiences entered my mind through my own senses. It felt magically different – having slept where they sleep, having eaten what they eat, and will all hopes, having felt what they feel.
I cannot forget what was told to us before we went there. Immersion is more than a curricular activity; it is a calling. God gave us a mission to fulfill upon our encounter with these less fortunate brothers of ours.
This mission, I believe, is to bring about positive change. The process may take long but I do hope it will be realized in time. This positive change primarily pertains to my growth and betterment as a person, to my personal attitude, and then the change will have to go out to the people around me, to my society.
Humility, generosity and compassion are some of the values that I can instill in me through this immersion. We are all equal in the eyes of God; hence, I should learn to reach out to people whose economic status can be considered lower than mine. To be humble is to see myself equal to my fellow human being. Giving something to the poor will not hurt me. More so, giving serves as blessing to both the giver and the receiver. If I live by receiving, why can’t I give something back? I should also bear in my mind the big difference between pity and compassion. Pity is simply the feeling of sympathy toward a needy or oppressed. Compassion is doing something about it. That is more important.
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