02.27.09
Esmeralda, what’s happening to you?
I was walking along the Fili building ground corridor about an hour ago after a very short meeting for Hugh Wester Award. I took notice of Sir P the Great and admitted to myself that I was not ready to see him, or for him to see me. Because, maybe, just maybe, he had already read my previous entry - something which is not impossible. That is the same reason why I just walked past him without giving any sign of attention. But Sir P the Great would not let me escape his introspection, shall I say. In fact, I was already heading toward a different direction when he called me by my name and exclaimed, “Esmeralda, what’s happening to you?” Followed by, “Have you checked your Friendster account already?” I teasingly said that I would be checking it next week, but truly I was already planning to go online right away. I had and am having mixed feelings since Sir P the Great called my attention. I was smiling to myself for the joy that someone is really reading or appreciating my blog, I was almost breaking into tears right there and then feeling pity for myself really for what is happening to me. And even more sorrowful because I am feeling helpless and hopeless already. If I were home writing this blog, I would have cried a river already. But since I am in a computer shop, I have to compose myself. Ang arte ko daw, ang sarap ko pitikin sa ilong. All right, he has the right to say that, because he has gone through a lot already. And thanks because he has sent me into laughter after having read that comment from him, however, with my hopeless condition, it took a while for me to digest what this mighty teacher is talking about. Indeed, I need to cry. I am already controlling the tears from falling down my face at this very point in time…
And I do not know what will happen next.
Will there be more blog entries on my very unfortunate condition?
It’s up to you. It’s up to me.
P.S. Sa mundong ito, na puno ng trahedya, may mga tao pa rin pala na nananatiling matapat sa tungkulin na “kapwa ko, pananagutan ko.” Tulad halimbawa ni Sir P the Great at iba pang guro sa katulad na departamento. Sila ay ang mga guro na hindi kailangan ng parangal o posisyon para totohanang magbigay ng simpleng kahulugan sa buhay ng mga mag-aaral at taong nakakasalamuha nila. Ang tangi kong masasabi, “Huwag sana silang mapagod at magsawa.” Sapagkat ang mga taong katulad nila ay kakaunti na lamang, mahirap na ngang manghawa, madali pang mangaubos.
